STOP and Think! It May Change Your Life!

Stop and think for a moment.

Consider the following question:

What have you changed your mind about recently?

In fact, how often are you prepared to change your mind?

Is being right of sole importance to you?

I think there is such a thing as a psychology of success, and it requires a bit of soul-searching.

I would like you to delve a little bit deeper and ask yourself:

Do I have a personal philosophy – a vision of sorts?

A positive mindset underpins the psychology of success.

A specific mind set is developed through having a personal philosophy.

If having a philosophical viewpoint is worthwhile then it becomes essential to reflect on the beliefs you hold, particularly those that may not be serving you.

At times you have to stop and think.

The big question:

Do many of your beliefs result in a payoff?

If so, do they produce the outcome you desire?

In truth, most of us have beliefs about all kinds of things, some of which prevent us from achieving what is preferable and more than possible.

Getting a handle on the inventory of our beliefs and making a decision to change some of them is a smart, welcome move.

So, what do you believe that isn’t serving you particularly well?

Are you being inflexible?

Again, stop and think for a moment.

Do you have a positive mindset?

Are you often prepared to accept that there may be a better way of doing something?

Can you easily adapt and adopt a different approach to your life?

How flexible is your mindset?

If you are prepared to think differently, it begins to soften long-held but questionable beliefs.

This act becomes part of a new philosophy, one which can start to underpin many ongoing actions and behaviours.

A pattern of thinking has been altered.

Your mindset has changed.

Having flexibility and changing your mind demonstrates strength.

This is a psychology of success in action.

Amplify this approach and suddenly life and its opportunities begins to open up.

Could anything be more important than this?

Beliefs are notoriously error prone.

Unlike science which focuses on indisputable facts, our thoughts are loosely based on conditioning and significant emotional experiences.

Simple one-off events quickly graduate and morph into a lifetime of conviction.

Mere chance can form a way of thinking that leaves the best of us hamstrung, uncertain and unyielding.

You may be interested to know that there is a simple remedy.

Begin to “watch” your thoughts and the words you use on a daily basis.

As a rudimentary exercise, start to get serious about all negative thinking you may find yourself engaged in.

Decide to stop the negative thoughts that flow through your mind.

This will free you up.

This is a mindset change.

How can this be done?

Spend a little concentrated time, perhaps when you are alone for a decent period, and examine the thought patterns you habitually find yourself thinking.

After completing this exercise for a few days you will have at your disposal certain comparative evidence that will prove how often you resort to negative, and hopefully, positive thinking.

Don’t be surprised if the negative thoughts win out!

Then take the next step.

Create an anchor you can use whenever a thought you do not want to have starts to surface.

Perhaps a straightforward auditory anchor such as the word “STOP” can be adopted.

The moment a negative thought comes into your consciousness tell your mind to “STOP!” then think of something positive.

Or better still simply reframe the negative thought.

Train your mind and it will soon get the message!

It will not be possible to prevent all negative thoughts occurring, so just accept this and be content that your unconscious is learning a new, more useful pattern.

Repetition is the key!

If you realise that you have just allowed a negative thought to occur without censure do not repeat the thought and correct yourself.

Let it go and stop and think.

Then attempt to tack something positive on to the end of it if you realise what has happened in a timely manner.

Never add additional strength to a negative thought by purposely repeating it.

Be aware that thoughts create words and words lead to behaviours.

Once a pattern is established by repeating it a number of times a habit has been formed.

Words are anchors.

If you find yourself saying “I can’t” you are educating your unconscious mind and before long you will have formed a limiting belief.

Try this exercise for a few days and enjoy the results because they will be forthcoming!

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Is Fear Holding You Back? Why Not Take One Step at a Time!

Summary

All journeys have a similar purpose – to get from one place to another place.

Often we can arrive at the destination without giving it a second thought, it just seems to happen.

Sometimes the place where we would like to be seems impossible to reach – our internal map cannot determine how to get there.

In these times we seem to be stuck in the same old place, inexplicably unable to move.

Bewilderment sets in.

What prevents a person from getting to the place they would prefer to be?

Basically fear, in particular fear of the unknown.

Yet, some places are just states of mind.

Article

All journeys have the same simple purpose – to get from one place to another place.

Occasionally we just seem to arrive at the destination without giving it a second thought.

Sometimes the place where we would like to be seems impossible to reach – our internal map cannot determine how to get there.

In these times we seem to be stuck in the same old place, inexplicably unable to move.

What prevents a person from getting to the place they would prefer to be?

Basically fear, in particular fear of the unknown.

Yet, some places are just states of mind.

Of course, it doesn’t help very much when we are told that most fears are just an illusion.

If your mind is full of self-doubt and fear, chances are that your journey will end in disappointment.

Perhaps this is the perfect time for a mindset change.

Fear gnaws away at the rational mind.

It fires the imagination to such a degree that we quickly become immobilized and stuck with no options.

And left alone the imagination causes the fear to grow way beyond its true worth.

However, when we take a deep breath and face our fears they often dissolve and before long completely disappear.

Wouldn’t it be better to look at a fear, analyze it, and then give ourselves permission to move beyond it?

How can this be done?

Well, if you want to overcome fear begin to behave and think like a scientist!

In science there is no such thing as failure.

There is simply an outcome.

Something is revealed.

It may not be precisely what is ideally wanted, but it does constitute information that can be used as feedback and fed forward to the next experiment.

Patterns of thinking and behaviour through conditioning can be elegantly interrupted by reframing what is wanted.

Fear itself is created from negative perceptions and leads to behavioural actions that prevent us from becoming the person we have the potential to be.

Thinking differently, even fearlessly, will junk most fears.

All it takes is will-power, determination, action and the energy to overcome fear.

Then with a new sense of mind control you can pursue what is truly desired.

Often all that is needed is to change the scale and size of the problem.

This can be achieved by breaking it down to manageable chunks – here comes the scientist again!

Once the size of the “frame” is altered its perspective will simultaneously be altered and it will invite a whole new world of possibility to miraculously come into view.

New information will be created.

Your mind will know how to cope.

This is the time for action.

So, take a step – just go ahead and do the first and now relatively simple task.

Then take the next step.

One step and task after another until you succeed.

If the next step is too difficult, break it down.

Life is infinitely easier when you know where you are going!

It is often stated that successful people always set goals.

They have definite plans, outcomes and deliverables.

They are “To Do” list advocates.

They unfailingly exercise strict mind control.

They have an in-built psychology of success.

However, many people find goal setting an imperfect task.

They can literally put so much pressure on themselves that they freeze with the result that they give up and stop bothering with goals.

Many people take “failure” far too personally. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

By assuming the role of scientist it becomes possible to detach from a goal and instead begin to find pleasure in the process itself.

In truth, everything is feedback and this provides us with the opportunity and mindset to learn something new.

And human beings are learning machines.

You cannot not learn.

So, fire up your imagination, don your white lab coat, and start to experiment!

Instead of losing weight, experiment with cutting out sugar and exercising more.

This is a simple but effective reframe and does not allow the mind to contemplate failure.

After all, an experiment provides a framework of discovery – what works and what doesn’t for you.

And it is a great learning tool.

A word of warning: don’t be surprised if you start succeeding at a rate of knots!

You never know, pretty soon you may become quite the adventurer!

And get those challenging goals.

Wouldn’t that be quite a journey and incredible fun!

Get Started on Improving Your Results NOW!

How to Process Advice and Avoid Disagreement 

One of the things to be wary of when seeking advice in conversation is the quality of the response generally received.

Additionally, we are all too aware that at times disagreement is experienced during conversation.

Much heat is generated, energy is wasted, and the wires come down though basically it’s nobody’s fault.

There is a tendency to respond to any advice with a different point of view, often preceded by words such as “Yes, but… “.

Perhaps a more superior reply that is inclusive and non-threatening is to use an Agreement Frame.

Rather than disputing what has been said it makes more sense to agree before tabling your view.

This softens resistance and leads to harmony and other possibilities.

It is better to avoid the words “but” and “understand”. In fact, it is the “and” that leads to the consideration of other alternative points of view.

“I agree… and… “I respect… and… “I appreciate… and…

“I appreciate what you are saying… and… ” “I agree with you; that’s absolutely right… and… “

“Look, I agree with everything you’ve said. You’re absolutely right.

From your perspective I see it that way too and I think you’ll agree with me that there are other ways of looking at this that could be equally as important”.

“I respect how emotional you are about this project. It’s quite a relief to talk to somebody who is so passionate in what they believe to be true and I know you’d welcome a couple of suggestions for your consideration”

“I appreciate your point of view. It’s so good to hear somebody speak their mind so clearly and honestly and I’m sure you’re open to an alternative that will create a win-win result.”

Keep in mind that when seeking advice the response you will receive is conditioned by the state of mind and current events occurring in the person’s life.

Notwithstanding this, it is often suggested that having a mentor or coach is a distinct advantage given the array of uncertainty life presents in all kinds of contexts.

Irrespective of the wisdom of this course of action it is imperative to be conscious of the circumstances this person may be dealing with. Just what is going on in their world?

How will the emotional ups and downs that are affecting their lives prejudice the answers communicated?

How will this affect the quality of the advice?

Experience reveals that most advice is just smoke and mirrors – well-intentioned but fairly pointless.

Knowing how to deal with disagreement and give yourself the best chance of receiving useful advice is a real plus.

Use the above methods to ensure the conversation is not shut down and the person remains open and positive.

You never know, a juicy pearl of wisdom may be forthcoming.

But above all be mindful that relying on your own mind and considerable attributes will generally serve you so much better.

That’s the real prize.

When you next place your head on your pillow ask your unconscious for feedback on a given tricky situation and don’t be too surprised if you wake up with a superior answer!

My advice?

Know Your Mind and trust your own judgment!

Get Started on Improving Your Results NOW!