In Part Nine we looked at the personal habits a master coach generally has.
In this part let’s begin with a few big questions:
What triggers the emotion of motivation?
How are important decisions made?
How can emotions be used to influence and persuade?
How do prospective clients choose you as the coach they want to work with?
One more question:
Why is emotional intelligence so important, so vital?
Without being too elaborate, it can be said that you actually have three brains.
That’s how smart you are!
The brain has evolved overtime.
The new brain, the neo-cortex, contains your core cognitive intelligence, and higher brain functions such as thought.
It separates humans from other primates.
It provides you with the ability to analyse, rationalize and deal with complex intellectual matters.
The mid brain, the mammalian brain, primarily looks after your emotions, your gut feelings.
The old brain, sometimes known as the reptilian or primitive brain, has been around forever and has enormous influence over decision making, particularly where and when it matters.
So, we have three brains, but basically one powerful decision maker because the old brain will override the other two specifically when critical decisions are made.
So, perhaps it can be said that, the new brain thinks.
The middle brain feels.
And the old brain uses information from the other two brains to make the big decisions.
The Limbic System is buried deep within the middle brain and is formed on top of the reptilian brain.
In evolutionary terms, it is much older than the cortex, just like the old brain.
This system contains the thalamus, hypothalamus, amygdala, and hippocampus.
It is the site of enabled learning – the freeze, flight or fight response, and of emotions and emotional memory.
The amygdala is fascinating.
It performs a primary role in the formation and storage of memories associated with emotional events.
As a coach, to get the best results, ideally you want to be aware that the amygdala has a greater influence over the cortex than the cortex has over the amygdala.
So, emotional arousal dominates rational thinking.
I’m sure you have experienced the feeling of being overwhelmed when your emotions dominate your thinking and actions.
The interesting thing about overwhelm is that when you feel overwhelmed with one thing, you can quickly feel overwhelmed with everything.
We have said that a master coach is highly adaptive and an expert at generating positive states in themselves and others.
Having the ability to inspire and influence emotionally is extraordinarily valuable and gets amazing results.
Now, the old brain is triggered by emotion.
When an emotion is felt, an event is far easier to remember.
If the person you would like to coach fails to remember your message, how can you expect them to choose you, and if chosen, how can you expect to deliver excellent results for them?
Put best, and in essence, you are a feeling machine that thinks, rather than a thinking machine that feels. So, engaging more emotionally is the key to getting clients and producing outstanding results with them.
To get more clients, and produce great results do the following:
1. Focus 100% on the person you are with, and not on yourself.
2. Make sure they know what can be done for them.
3. State where they are now and where they will be when you have completed your journey with them.
4. Ensure your message contains simple to understand concepts, such as “making more money”, “promotion”, “success”.
5. Open your conversation strongly and repeat this message at the end. The middle part will quickly be forgotten.Take this feedback and feed it forward.
6. Find a way to use visual stimuli – the optic nerve is faster than the auditory nerve.
7. Get into the emotional states that produce the best response.
8. Become a master at changing state several times, easily and effortlessly.