Clearly, having the skill to match, mirror and lead people during an important conversation is more than useful.
After all, we want to get our goals.
Prior to an appointment you can ask yourself 3 simple questions to set the scene and get yourself into the right frame of mind:
One: How are you feeling right now?
Two: How do you want to feel?
Three: What strategies do you have to feel that way?
Let’s recap on what Emotional Intelligence really is.
It is the ability to problem solve with emotional information.
So, your emotional intelligence is the ability you have to solve problems using your emotions.
A common definition goes something like this:
The capacity for recognising our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves and for managing emotions effectively in others and ourselves.
Communication skills rely on dealing with emotions on a day-to-day basis.
And by the way, not using these emotional signals is like shooting yourself in the foot!
What sets your communication apart?
It is the ability to use logic and emotion together to produce clear and concise information.
Feelings are not just important, they are crucial!
Emotional intelligence makes the key difference and provides communication skills that will get the results you want.
How you use your emotional intelligence will depend upon your values.
However, if you do not have core emotional intelligence skills you will struggle to live out your values.
How do we become good at regulating our emotions?
So, how are you feeling right now?
Take the time to write down a few words to describe how you are feeling right now.
The words used will point to your thinking style in the present moment.
Asking yourself how you are feeling right now will lead to wondering how the people you are dealing with are also feeling.
This recognition of your own feelings and the feelings of others is the starting point and will provide you with information you can use in any situation to get better results
And it leads to:
How do you want to feel?
Is your state appropriate way for what you want to do?
Your mood directly impacts your thinking.
Now, what is the most effective mood for a given task and context?
Go ahead and retrieve a memory from your vast database of personal experiences and step into it fully and completely.
Really embrace it.
Practice doing this until it is second nature.
Emotions are important signals and the ability to read these signals, together with skills in persuasion and influence, can transform your communication results.
Communication is not just about being logical!
Influencing others requires communication strategies based on emotional intelligence to get the results you want
Learning persuasion techniques is an important part of effective communication.
Coaching people in this area will produce an enormous payoff.